thuja

[Liz Lalor]

Abuse case:

Presenting Issue: Erectile impotency.

Male aged 45 years.
The first consultation and inquiry was centered on a counseling session for his inability to 'be able to provide love to his partner'. No remedy was given first session. The physical symptoms listed were erectile problems. He is unable to become firm enough to find it easy to enter her vagina. He quite often also experiences immediate ejaculation without achieving orgasm; often directly upon being touched. The fact that he ejaculates without achieving orgasm is an interesting characteristic. I ask him about this. He says he is split and separated from himself and swears he has no sensation of an orgasm. He describes that he feels completely unable to be connected to himself at this time. He expressed that after he immediately ejaculates it is an enormous relief as he is then 'let off having to have sex.' He also suffers from a sore swollen penis after sex. He has no sexual desire and has no problem with satisfying his partner with no need to have sex himself. He has also told his partner he would have no problems with her taking a lover; as long as it was purely for sexual satisfaction on her part. He expressed his needs in a relationship as his need to support and love his partner; to provide cuddles and closeness and spiritual love. He also expressed that his partner has frequently complained about 'the mess' he has made if he ejaculates. His partner is extremely anxious about becoming pregnant, and has insists he control himself and not ejaculate inside of her. This has resulted in an increased level of pressure which has exasperated his erectile problems. He believes that the fact that his partner does not want any part of himself inside of her is a spiritual rejection of him. Her disgust with his sperm makes him feel unwanted. He is unable to use condoms and looses his erection immediately. I asked him to relay all of his sexual experiences.

The first time he had sex at the age of 16 he was drunk as was the woman. The woman was 31 yrs old and upon hearing he was a virgin, took extreme umbrage and attacked him with a knife. He fled back to his ship; he was a sailor. He stayed on the ship for weeks terrified as it was reported to him by his fellow sailors that the woman was out to knife him. His next experience at age 18 years of age also ended in physical abuse. This woman was also sexually excited by being physically abused, and the idea of accommodating her made him physically and emotionally disgusted. He ended up physically vomiting allover her.

I asked him to tell me about his childhood and relationship with his mother and father. His father was physically abusive. He was beaten extensively by his father. His father was unpredictable and reactive. He related a painful experience of his train set being smashed by his father. His mother was also physically abusive. Although his father used to beat him up he was able to stop; his mother was unable to stop the beating and his father had to literally pull her off him. He has one sister who was also physically abused. His sister is 'simple.' There is a question in my mind as to whether she was mentally damaged as a result of being beaten at an early age. At the age of 16 he was told he could not come home by his mother. He was on leave from his ship and was told he was not welcome because he had previously made his sister's boyfriend unwelcome at the house because he did not approve of him. His sister married this particular fellow who has since turned out to be an abuser who beats her up.

He is very scared that the present relationship he is in is also abusive. He comments on the similarity between her not wanting his sperm inside of her to her also not wanting his furniture or belongings in her house. He has moved from 'the country he loves,' England to Australia. She has expressed that she does not want his furniture or books that he has shipped. She is a writer and has a room in the house as hers in which he is not allowed to enter. He is dismayed that he is not given the same courtesy of being given his own space. He feels overwhelmed by her reactions to him expressing any of his desires. My impression based on his expression is that she is attacking and extremely hyper-vigilant to perceived criticism. He felt powerless to express his likes or dislikes when they were finding a house to live. He also struggles physically with being able to physically enter her vagina. He feels his penis is too weak.

His only non abusive sexual relationship was with a woman who was 11 years older than him when he was 39 years. He found that because her vagina had given birth to two children it was easier for him to enter. He also experienced that semi erect he able to satisfy her for longer and her vagina was more open. It was evident that the woman herself was also open and non-judgmental and accepting of him. The strongest aspect about this relationship that I noted was that she was not critical or abusive. He feels that he made the biggest mistake of his life when he stopped having a relationship with her. She ended the relationship as she felt he needed to go off and have his life and children with someone. She expressed that she had, had her life, and that she felt she was holding him back from having the chance to have a life. He also relayed that he was not sexually anxious with her as he was not attracted to her. He is still in contact with her and they have a very tender friendship. His present partner is extremely jealous if he ever talks about this relationship. I noted that it was interesting that he had no sexual attraction to her.

His third sexual experience was at the age of 21. That woman he married. He was able to have a successful sexual relationship with his wife for 9 years from the point of view of an erect penis. Although he ejaculated with her he did not have an orgasm with that ejaculation. After 9 years of marriage his wife left with no warning. He described himself from the age of 16years as being completely detached from his feelings. He felt this was from the time his mother told him never to come home again. Because of his violent childhood he has always been terrified of the thought of having children in case he himself turned out to be violent towards his children. He never told his wife the reasons behind never wanting to have children. His wife hates him and is extremely embittered as she felt that she had missed out on the opportunity to have children because of his desire not to have children. After 9 years of marriage his wife asked him to give up sailing. He refused and she left the marriage. She had apparently equated him giving up sailing with her having to give up children and his desire to not do that she interpreted as extremely painful. She has since married his best friend; which he finds extremely painful. After his marriage broke up he had his first experience of counseling. The counselor at the time made him aware of his violent childhood. From that moment he felt that the wall and block he had around himself was broken down. He also felt that it was after counseling that he had his only non abusive relationship with the 50 year old woman, when he was 39years old. After counseling he has also been able to have an orgasm. He however still experiences the inability to achieve a hard enough erection to be able to comfortably enter his partner without experiencing extreme pain in his penis. He also expressed that he felt that his penis was too weak to be able to penetrate his partner's vagina. He feels that sex is painful. He says he still feels separated or split from himself. He also feels that he has never felt spiritually connected while having sex; he only feels connected when he is cuddling his partner.

His next sexual experience was with a woman who wanted to have sex in the open; in particular in the forest. He met her through a walking group and as they were walking in the forest she would take off her clothes and insist that he have sex with her. He was not able to be able to perform in these circumstances and she became physically violent towards him.

The next sexual experience was with a married woman who wanted him to be sexually violent. Not only did this terrify him because he is scared he could be like his mother unable to stop once he started to be physically violent; but her husband also was violent and they lived in the same district and he was terrified of the husband finding out about the relationship. He also suffered erectile problems in this affair.

He at present is terrified of being kicked out by his present partner because of his inability to perform sexually. He was forced by her to come and see me. He is scared about being alone in a new country without any friends and no partner. He also related that in England he had had long periods of time in his life in no relationship and that he was more content being alone without being in a relationship in which he is under pressure to have sex.

I felt that it was extremely important that he firstly decide if he wanted to come back to me; and secondly I refused to give him any homoeopathics or herbal supplements for sexual performance until we talked more about this history. I felt to give him a product for erectile problems negated his feelings and could also be abusive. He expressed a strong disgust at being sent off to someone to get these products and that he felt that he would only be wanted for being a sex machine. He is totally disgusted at the idea of taking Viagra. The fact that he felt totally unable to say that he actually did not want to come and see me in the first place was extremely important to note. I did not make another appointment for him but asked him to think about whether he would like to come back and see me. I also asked him to think about whether he could sit down with his partner and tell her about his childhood. I also offered the opportunity of a counseling session with his partner. He felt very relieved at the idea of joint counseling as he felt that he would have someone to protect him from her. He also relayed that he had been previously unsuccessful in talking with her as she takes it as a criticism and attacks him. He would be very happy if he never had sex again. He has no sexual desire. He once again thinks the best solution is for his partner to take a lover to satisfy her sexually; although he reiterated that he is happy to satisfy her sexually as long as it does not involve penetration on his part. He agreed very strongly with me that he would feel that if I gave him a remedy to take it would be negating of his feelings. I felt this was an important aspect of the case to note. He felt that I if he took something then he would have to have sex. I noted that he did not want to have sex and that he did not want to find a solution to his erectile problem. The fact that he did not want to have sex ever again I felt was very important.

He works as a problem solving computer analyst for a large corporation. In his job people ring up to complain about the problems they are having with their commuter program. Frequently the clients are abusive. His partner introduces him at parties as working for an exploitive multi national. He feels that she is disrespectable of his job, and he feels belittled after she has introduced him.
Thematic Repertory.
The repertorising of this case I found to be difficult. I felt it was such a disturbing case history that to use the physicals missed the trauma of his childhood, and his sexual history. I decided to use Mirilli's repertory and analyze the case on the basis of themes.

1.. Attacked.
2.. Attacked - touch.
3.. Aversion - Loathing.
4.. Damage - Hurt.
5.. Hurt - Approached.
6.. Hit - Attacked.
7.. Indifference, sexual.
8.. Fragile.
Rubrics:

a.. Fear; attacked, of being: carc. stram.
b.. Fear; approaching of others: acet-ac. ambr. anac.ant-c.ARN.ars. bar-c. bell. Cadm-s. cann-i. caust. cham. con. cupr. cupr-acet. graph. ign. iod. lyc. nux-v. op. petr. phos. plb. rhod. sep. stram. stry. tarent. thuj. valer.
c.. Aversion; mother, to: thuj.
d.. Ailments from; abuse, childhood, in: carc. stram. thuj.
e.. Fear; approaching, others, of, delirium, in: cupr. stram. thuj.
f.. Delusion; body, delicate, is: thuj.

Thuja: Mirilli: P,p. 1080-1082.
Al, 5- She has a decided sensation that her soul is separated from her body(split), and in such a condition hears and feels everything as from distance. Themes: divided, double, separated.

Al,51- Remarkable indifference to the opposite sex. (sexual) Themes: indifference, sexual.

He, 12- Insane woman will be not touched or approached. Themes: touch, approached.

He, 9- Sensation as if whole body were thin and delicate, (weak, fragile, frail) and could not resist least attack (illness); as if continuity of body would be dissolved. Themes: fragile, disease, disintegration, ruined.
Bibliography

Mirilli, J.A. MD, Thermatic Repertory and materia medica of the mind symptoms. The Netherlands, IRHIS, 2000.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[Gail]

Is there a remedy that looks like Thuja, but is more right sided and
loves onions?

Gail

[Rochelle]

If you are thinking of giving Thuja to a patient but do not want to because
of these 2 things do look again and remember about Polarities!!

Rochelle
Registered Homeopath
EFT(Advanced) Practitioner
www.southporthomeopathy.co.uk

[Soroush Ebrahimi]

Dear Gail

This would be an interesting search - however, Thuj is under GENERALS -
SIDE - right

So why the need for more search? What is worrying you?

Regards

Soroush

[Gail]

It's mostly curiosity Soroush, the onion thing is supposed to be such
a strong keynote, a lot of other things line up, and I'm just
checking for alternatives.

I was reading the materia medica after doing the matrix and didn't
think to go back to the repertory again - thanks for that.

Gail

--- In minutus@yahoogroups.com, "Finrod" wrote:
GENERALS -
Behalf
Homoeopathy and
regarding
document read
and/or
their use
its
incidental,
change your
single
29/10/2007

[Sheri Nakken]

you never will have all the symptoms of the substance and the remedy will
never have all your symptoms

At 01:09 PM 10/31/2007 -0000, you wrote:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sheri Nakken, former R.N., MA, Hahnemannian Homeopath
Well Within & Earth Mysteries & Sacred Site Tours (worldwide)
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http://www.wellwithin1.com/vaccine.htm
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[bored_chick]

in one reading I had seen that thuja has a hard time looking in the mirror--is this due to self disgust or is it similar in any way to natmur with-thinks looks wretched when looking in mirror

[Lynn Cremona]

Luc de Schepper:

Concepts split personality: ALUM.dsl ANAC.dsl Lach.dsl Thuj.dsl
Concepts - split personality - I feel I don't know myself when I look in the mirror.
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