My son and his issues
Posted: Mon Apr 07, 2014 9:24 pm
Ellen Modano suggested that I give the group a more thorough description of my son so that some of you could help me better with his issues. So she will be getting two copies of this:
My 15 year old son is very slender right now. He works out seriously and happily at the gym. He has no muscle definition yet, I think because his testosterone has not yet begun to flow in any meaningful way. He is still boy like. He is very, very dear. He is a picky eater. He is very affectionate with his family and our two dogs. He lies like a gorilla, whenever it suits his needs, even though I counsel him strongly not to lie. He not only lies, he is an expert manipulator and even studies lie detection. But he is not malicious; he is very caring. He is more like a diplomat. He doesn't want to hurt people's feelings, but he tries to get what he wants using deception, often by simply not telling the entire truth.
I am not certain about the content of his exercise, but I do know that it is most vigorous. He is very conscientious about bathing and his appearance, but his room is bad and I am on his case constantly about it. His mother is Filipina and he sleeps with her often, even though I am very gently on his case about that. I tell him that it will retard his testosterone production (which is a fact) to do that, but he does it anyway. Ever since Kiara was killed, I have kept quiet about it. My spiritual mentor has counseled me to not worry about it, that it is part of the Filipino culture.
I just figure that he will take a little longer to grow up physically and that is not really a problem. Fine wine takes longer to mature. Mitchell seems to have a very low tolerance for stress, so I am handling him with extreme sweetness and trusting him and encouraging him in the right direction. He studies voluntarily; I don't need to tell him to study. He gets along very well with everyone. He could have 4 or even more people in his little room at one time, and we don't have anything there other than him that would attract so many other people his age. I am also happily impressed with the quality of the people that he hangs out with.
He has brown hair and brown eyes and a ready smile. I keep telling him that he is going to break hearts when he get older. He is not yet interested in girls in any meaningful way (nor boys for that matter). Years ago I had him checked to see that everything was developing properly down below because years before that I noticed that they were not. The doctor said that everything was OK, but I had to take him to a doctor to get him examined because he is so VERY shy about his privates, even when he was young. He has absolutely no tolerance for anything disgusting. He will leave the room if the television shows love making scenes. And homosexual love scenes will get an even stronger reaction. He has no tolerance for anything dirty or disgusting. For me, I like that. I tell him constantly that he will best be happy if his character development stays way ahead of his sexual development. I have always tried to partner with him with regard to his growing up and tell him what we are doing and why. It doesn't help to keep things a secret.
He was very close to Kiara, the girl who was accidentally shot to death by her step-father. His grades dropped immediately after that happened on Dec. 25th. They were not on a kissing relationship, but Mitchell was devastated. But I guess he expects me to read his mind, like so many people, and I just didn't realize for weeks how badly he was affected.
Years ago, he had nightmares that would give Wes Cravens a phucking heart attack. He would run around the house screaming and such and think that he had to do this or that and we would have to catch him and hold him and hug him and love him. And when he would finally start to wake up he would have such sweet love and affection for "you guys" and we would hug him and love him for many minutes or longer. His nightmares seem to have disappeared until the one that he had a few days ago when he screamed and he flipped me off in his sleep. Without waking up, he managed to walk down stairs from his room to the living room and put his head in his mother's lap on the couch. Then she gets up to go to the gym and puts a pillow under his head. I later put a blanket over him. At no point has he woken up. About an hour later he screams a short, loud scream. I lean over the railing of the stairs and reassure him, and he flips me off and assumes the position that people usually associate with someone being asleep. And later when I ask him about it, he remembers nothing. [At least he is not running around the house screaming bloody murder.]
This coupled with his very low tolerance for stress are issues that need to be addressed.
I know that EVERYONE is the most precious darling that God ever created, but this most precious darling that God ever created is the one that happens to own my heart, so I would deeply appreciate it if anyone has any suggestions that might help.
One wrinkle is that he is going to need some dental care soon, so how does that impact the homeopathy care?
Sincerely,
Roger Bird, sincerely trying to be a good father for a very dear boy
My 15 year old son is very slender right now. He works out seriously and happily at the gym. He has no muscle definition yet, I think because his testosterone has not yet begun to flow in any meaningful way. He is still boy like. He is very, very dear. He is a picky eater. He is very affectionate with his family and our two dogs. He lies like a gorilla, whenever it suits his needs, even though I counsel him strongly not to lie. He not only lies, he is an expert manipulator and even studies lie detection. But he is not malicious; he is very caring. He is more like a diplomat. He doesn't want to hurt people's feelings, but he tries to get what he wants using deception, often by simply not telling the entire truth.
I am not certain about the content of his exercise, but I do know that it is most vigorous. He is very conscientious about bathing and his appearance, but his room is bad and I am on his case constantly about it. His mother is Filipina and he sleeps with her often, even though I am very gently on his case about that. I tell him that it will retard his testosterone production (which is a fact) to do that, but he does it anyway. Ever since Kiara was killed, I have kept quiet about it. My spiritual mentor has counseled me to not worry about it, that it is part of the Filipino culture.
I just figure that he will take a little longer to grow up physically and that is not really a problem. Fine wine takes longer to mature. Mitchell seems to have a very low tolerance for stress, so I am handling him with extreme sweetness and trusting him and encouraging him in the right direction. He studies voluntarily; I don't need to tell him to study. He gets along very well with everyone. He could have 4 or even more people in his little room at one time, and we don't have anything there other than him that would attract so many other people his age. I am also happily impressed with the quality of the people that he hangs out with.
He has brown hair and brown eyes and a ready smile. I keep telling him that he is going to break hearts when he get older. He is not yet interested in girls in any meaningful way (nor boys for that matter). Years ago I had him checked to see that everything was developing properly down below because years before that I noticed that they were not. The doctor said that everything was OK, but I had to take him to a doctor to get him examined because he is so VERY shy about his privates, even when he was young. He has absolutely no tolerance for anything disgusting. He will leave the room if the television shows love making scenes. And homosexual love scenes will get an even stronger reaction. He has no tolerance for anything dirty or disgusting. For me, I like that. I tell him constantly that he will best be happy if his character development stays way ahead of his sexual development. I have always tried to partner with him with regard to his growing up and tell him what we are doing and why. It doesn't help to keep things a secret.
He was very close to Kiara, the girl who was accidentally shot to death by her step-father. His grades dropped immediately after that happened on Dec. 25th. They were not on a kissing relationship, but Mitchell was devastated. But I guess he expects me to read his mind, like so many people, and I just didn't realize for weeks how badly he was affected.
Years ago, he had nightmares that would give Wes Cravens a phucking heart attack. He would run around the house screaming and such and think that he had to do this or that and we would have to catch him and hold him and hug him and love him. And when he would finally start to wake up he would have such sweet love and affection for "you guys" and we would hug him and love him for many minutes or longer. His nightmares seem to have disappeared until the one that he had a few days ago when he screamed and he flipped me off in his sleep. Without waking up, he managed to walk down stairs from his room to the living room and put his head in his mother's lap on the couch. Then she gets up to go to the gym and puts a pillow under his head. I later put a blanket over him. At no point has he woken up. About an hour later he screams a short, loud scream. I lean over the railing of the stairs and reassure him, and he flips me off and assumes the position that people usually associate with someone being asleep. And later when I ask him about it, he remembers nothing. [At least he is not running around the house screaming bloody murder.]
This coupled with his very low tolerance for stress are issues that need to be addressed.
I know that EVERYONE is the most precious darling that God ever created, but this most precious darling that God ever created is the one that happens to own my heart, so I would deeply appreciate it if anyone has any suggestions that might help.
One wrinkle is that he is going to need some dental care soon, so how does that impact the homeopathy care?
Sincerely,
Roger Bird, sincerely trying to be a good father for a very dear boy